


Gold Dust

by Naughty_Yorick



Category: Megamind (2010)
Genre: But sexy dancing, Dancing, F/M, Romantic Comedy, kidnapping gone wrong, silliness
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-19
Updated: 2018-02-19
Packaged: 2019-03-21 10:22:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,699
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13738830
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Naughty_Yorick/pseuds/Naughty_Yorick
Summary: "He can't see her at first, but can hear a deep bassy beat coming from the apartment. He raises his head just a little higher to see - and suddenly she bursts into view.She's dancing."Roxanne tries to remember if she can dance. Spoiler alert: Yes, she can.





	Gold Dust

It's been...a good day. Lately, Roxanne has been having more Good Days. She's limited her mom to one call a week (no more planning for an imaginary wedding), her boss has finally agreed to the promotion and raise, her friend Fiona from college is due to arrive in Metro City in a few days _and_ , finally, she's managed to convince Metro Man to drop the stupid charade and officially announce that they _aren't_ a couple.

She's been wearing him down for months, and she finally managed to break through to him yesterday afternoon during one of their weekly catch ups in a little bar near the edge of town. No more faking it for the cameras, no more unpleasant questions, no more eternal single-dom. After she had listed the benefits of their new arrangement, Metro Man had added one of his own, curled it into a question:

“No more kidnappings?”

He had done that thing - the eyebrow thing - which she knew worked on damn well near everyone else in Metro City but not on her. She had looked him dead in the eye and replied, simply - “Maybe”.

They had decided that they wouldn't make a public announcement until after the next kidnapping. Roxanne had suggested - okay, insisted - that she tell Megamind first, and in person. And as she had no way to find him, they'd have to wait for him to come to her.

Metro Man had pressed why she was so keen to tell him first, but Roxanne wasn't giving him anything.

“I just think it's _fair_ , Wayne” she had said, gently stirring her G&T, “You know how jumpy he is, he'll get...offended or something”

Wayne had raised his eyebrows at her.

“You know, he probably _will_ stop kidnapping you.”

 It was a statement. A carefully worded statement, said by someone who was keen to remain impartial on the matter.

“You know I _am_ more than just bait, Wayne. Kidnapping one of the most prominent members of Metro City is-”

“Probably not as effective as kidnapping Metro Man’s girlfriend, Roxie. You sure you wanna do this?”

“Whatever you're thinking, Wayne, don't. Okay?”

“Whatever you say, Rox”

 

Truthfully she wasn't particularly looking forward to telling Megamind. The past few kidnappings had gone surprisingly well and he'd even come close to winning a couple of times. _Close_. The banter had been excellent and, honestly, the thought of the kidnappings stopping made her, well. Not sad, but...worried. Concerned. It felt like the few days before a breakup, before an inevitable falling out, the last few days before the _last day_. She was trying not to think about it. Wayne had suggested that Megamind might start kidnapping someone else - she was sure he'd said it just to get a rise out of her - and _that_ thought was even worse.

But right now, that's future-Roxanne’s problem. Right now it’s finally Friday, and she has the _whole_ of next week off, and she still has a bottle of champagne in her fridge after last week’s gala. Wayne slipped it to her at the end of the night for keeping up the doting girlfriend act all evening - being a fake girlfriend has its perks, she supposes.

She dumps her bag near the door and heads upstairs, finally able to rip off the stupid skirt-suit she’s been wearing all day and replace it with a pair of black leggings and a white tank top. It’s nice to be able to _move_ again.

Roxanne heads back downstairs and plugs her phone into the apartment’s speaker system, scrolling through her music. There’s a club mix that Fi sent her ages ago, songs that they used to go out and dance to before they had to settle down and start pretending to be grown-ups. She knows, vaguely, that Fi likes to update it with newer songs that she thinks Roxanne might like, but she doesn’t listen to it enough to hear any of them.

She puts the playlist on shuffle then sashays over to the fridge and retrieves the bottle of champagne. The cork pops and flies across the room, but she manages not to spill a drop - this is one of her less marketable skills. She pours herself a glass and maneuvers back into the living room. Truthfully, it’s a bit of a mess, but she’s in one of those moods where tidying doesn’t actually sound like such a bad idea. Within ten minutes, she’s bopping around the sofa with the vacuum cleaner in one hand and the glass of champagne in the other.

The mix that Fi made takes her back. She misses college, and those few years after graduation getting journalism experience and hanging out with her best friend. She used to love dancing. She catches herself - no, she _still_ loves dancing, she just...doesn’t have anyone to go dancing with right now.

_Urgh, no, Roxanne, we are not getting bogged down in this right now._

When she was younger  she’d have been out in some club at this time on a Friday night in a tiny dress and enormous heels, dancing with Fi or chatting up some random guy. Even when she was younger and (she doesn’t want to admit) slimmer, she was always _curvy_ , and she absolutely used it to her advantage. Truthfully, she misses feeling exciting - nowadays she spends more time being sensible than sexy and the only guys who flirt with her are creeps like Hal. She makes a mental note to insist that she and Fi go out at least twice before she heads off again, then edits that note to remind herself that Fiona has probably already planned exactly where they’re going and (knowing her) what they’re wearing.

Gradually, the apartment is getting tidier as she dances around. The glass of champagne sits on the kitchen breakfast bar as she bounces about.

A song shuffles on that she instantly recognises. She knows _exactly_ why Fi included this one. This is one of _their_ songs, one that would make them both squeal and run onto the dance floor no matter what they were doing.

The beat is fast and frantic and the lyrics just fast enough that it looks impressive when she manages to sing along perfectly. The best part is the drop. At college, she could do this...thing...with her hips in time to the music. She’s not properly danced in _months_ , but her body seems to remember exactly what it’s supposed to be doing.

 

\--------------

 

This is, truly, an evil plan. Megamind tries to keep home kidnappings to a minimum as he can't always guarantee that he won't wind up destroying her sofa (again) or setting fire to her curtains (again), but this one is too good an opportunity to miss. He’s ordered the brainbots to stay at home, just in case, and has opted to kidnap her himself - something he very rarely does. He brings the hoverbike, lands it on the roof and slowly rappells onto the balcony.

_Shit_. Patio furniture? That’s new. He’s always relied on Roxanne having a fairly empty balcony, but now it's got...chairs, and a table, and all sorts of outdoor nonsense which, frankly, is getting in his way. He throws himself outwards, managing a deft land on the wall, before gingerly stepping down and crouching behind the new bistro table. At least it provides better cover.

He peers over the top of the table, through the patio doors, to see what she's up to. Usually at this time she’ll be on the phone to her mother, eating dinner, just getting out of the shower or binge-watching something on the Neetflix. He makes it a point of honour to _always_ retreat if she’s just gotten out of the shower, and another to _always_ kidnap her if she’s on the phone to her mom.

But today...he can't see her at first, but can hear a deep bassy beat coming from the apartment. He raises his head _just_ a little higher to see - and suddenly she bursts into view.

She's _dancing_.

Megamind’s experience of dancing is limited at best, restricted to the old-timey musicals that he has a small fondness for or that strange celebrity dancing show Minion makes him watch. But this...this is something _entirely_ different.

He can hear the fast beat of the music through the glass doors and watches, fascinated, as Roxanne _struts_ around the room, her eyes closed. He is very aware that he probably shouldn’t be here, that on some level this is just as intimate as her wandering around wearing only a towel, but he can’t pull himself away. He finds himself standing, almost unconsciously, to get a better look. Her arms are raised, her fists making circles in the air, as she lowers her weight down on one leg in a kind of slow roll of her hips. Megamind can feel himself blushing and knows, if she turns around, or opens her eyes, that he’s a dead man. The beat changes slightly and she starts to do a kind of slow, deliberate move - her arms following a slow pattern through the air before brushing against the top of her thighs. Megamind watches, hypnotised, watches her arms and fists and hips and legs and then, as if on a queue Megamind can’t hear, she just...well.

Everything moves at once. Part of his brain is screaming and the other part is thinking _how is she doing that with her hips?!_ This is it, this is how he’s going to die, on Roxanne’s balcony watching her dance around her living room, desperately trying to convince himself to _stop looking at her ass for Evil’s sake, man!_

And then she turns around, to face the window, and suddenly her ass isn't the problem anymore.

Megamind shrieks, and all of his reason and logic and more importantly _motor control_ come flooding back at once. He wrenches his arms up, covers his eyes with his hands, stumbles backwards and smashes into the new patio furniture with a  crash which shakes the glass panes of the door.

He lies there, his hands still very firmly held over his eyes. The music suddenly grows louder and clearer. Then…

“ _Megamind?”_

**Author's Note:**

> For those who are wondering, the song Roxanne is dancing to is 'Gold Dust' by DJ Fresh - you can listen to it here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RNuUgbUzM8U
> 
> (and, yes, I used to dance like this when I was at uni. Or, *tried* to dance like this)


End file.
